he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize