Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize