You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
These tits shall not be calmed
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
