if you like me you must not know who I am
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
