Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
