So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
My day in three words: secret purse cake
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
