Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize