bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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