no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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