i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
