God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
