I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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