Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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