Dual....:-)
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize