Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
