Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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