haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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