Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am http://tfl.nu/u3w5
  Replies (4) Good night (1163) Bad night (1373)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice http://tfl.nu/q2o9
  Replies (20) Good night (712) Bad night (3750)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely http://tfl.nu/wliv
  Replies (37) Good night (559) Bad night (4169)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets. http://tfl.nu/zt9l
  Replies (12) Good night (561) Bad night (4847)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight. http://tfl.nu/26e1
  Replies (1) Good night (1286) Bad night (1819)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES. http://tfl.nu/638m
  Replies (15) Good night (2818) Bad night (1089)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING http://tfl.nu/fw3v
  Replies (8) Good night (1423) Bad night (705)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all http://tfl.nu/abyi
  Replies (5) Good night (1176) Bad night (401)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging. http://tfl.nu/wawj
  Replies (4) Good night (449) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities http://tfl.nu/jkst
  Replies (4) Good night (1024) Bad night (265)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week. http://tfl.nu/gko2
  Replies (6) Good night (883) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there. http://tfl.nu/hpvl
  Replies (0) Good night (379) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more. http://tfl.nu/fpyx
  Replies (1) Good night (390) Bad night (254)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face http://tfl.nu/fni1
  Replies (5) Good night (473) Bad night (249)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world. http://tfl.nu/39cd
  Replies (4) Good night (399) Bad night (177)

Randomize