my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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