Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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