This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
