I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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