Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I have aggressive nipples.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
