he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
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I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
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Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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