You can't motorboat a personality
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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