so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
