I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
COCAINE IS GR8
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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