My nipple is on Facebook.
Can Purell be used as lube?
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize