i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
