My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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