Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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