Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
