Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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