There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
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On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
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Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
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