I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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