Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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