I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
