I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
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