the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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