yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
