Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
