is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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