they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
