im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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