we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Mom said you looked used
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
