A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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