Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
