Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
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I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
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Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You pole danced in your parka.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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