so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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