Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
