He kissed a someone with a penis
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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